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  • Leila Field

Improving your life by saying YES to you

I had a tendency to "people-please" for as long as I can remember. It was so deep in my subconscious that for the longest time I didn’t even know I was doing it. People pleasing can show in many different habits and behaviours. One of these could be saying yes to things or people when you would rather say NO.


Have you even been in a situation where you were really looking forward to spending some time at home but when you were asked to cover extra shifts at work you said yes? Maybe it was a family/ friends getting together when all your body wanted was to take a nap? There will always be times that call for your awareness and ability to say no depending on the situation.


Have you even considered that by saying yes to activities that don’t align with you at the time, you are actually saying no to yourself, your needs and your goals? What are you missing out on or taking away from yourself on when you do this? When we aren't listening to ourselves, tension is created in our bodies and that can cause physical stress within the body as well as an increase in cortisol. Giving yourself permission to say no and not feel guilty about it is self care.


Self-care is becoming more widely discussed and we are making more of an effort to find time for ourselves but often it’s the first thing we throw out when we feel like we’ll upset someone or let them down. The word “no” can have a lot of emotional charge for some people and that can make it challenging to say. So here are a few other ways to say it - try these on and see how they feel:


“I am not available at that time” “I’m not sure, can I get back to you?” “I have other commitments at that time”

You deserve to spend your time doing what lights you up and feeds your body and soul. The commitments you make to yourself are just as important, if not more, than the commitments you make to others. Commit to you first to take back your time and start saying YES to your dreams, YES to your goal and YES to you.


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